So I have to write this as I still can’t believe how stupid some people are…

Dildo #1 – the chick with the pickup truck that roared around me and another car who were all turning left INTO A SCHOOL YARD, and she roared around us ON OUR LEFT, just as I was about to TURN LEFT into a BUSY FUCKING SCHOOL YARD. Yes if she hit me, myself, my dog, my kid, my car – all affected. Put she would have hit the FUCKING SCHOOL BUS that was leaving the school and the little TINY CHILDREN who are walking on the sidewalk. I couldn’t catch her licence plate but holy crap if I did, she would be going down.

Deep breath.

Dildo#2 – Dude in the FUCKING ROW BOAT who has a 7 months pregnant wife at him who decides it’d be awesome to row from Africa to I can’t remember where with no support vessels and then capsizes the freaking boat. Time for a reality check guy. You have a PREGNANT WIFE at home. Buck up and think of someone other then your own personal goals. You are going to have a FUCKING BABY.

Dildo#3 – Rob Ford. I dunno, every morning there is some new story about him and it isn’t like he did anything today in particular but hearing his crappy voice on the Metro Morning saying – WE NEED A CASINO – I am like, you are so super annoying – shut your mouth with a giant hamburger from that giant fat hamburger stand that you are so happy will be gracing city hall soon enough.

And finally…

Dildo #4 – the TURD who wrote a letter so some Ontario board claiming that the best restaurant that I’ve ever been to (which just so happens to be located down the street from me), Bistro Seven Seven, doesn’t use locally owned food in their establishment and should take that claim off their marketing hoopla, forcing the restaurant to spend thousands on updating a bunch of signs/their website/all their marketing materials. And for what? What purpose will that serve that DILDO? Do you have that much time on your hands, that you will waste all of OUR TIME by making a stupid complaint like that? This restaurant serves amazing food, and is located in our tiny little town that, let’s be honest here, doesn’t have a huge amount going for it restaurant wise.

So now they are being probed by some crap government organization over this stupid complaint which is probably some local farmer who is pissed that they use potatoes from a competitor and not theirs, getting their panties in a bunch. Bistro dude spends a TON of cash on using LOCAL Ontario beef, LOCAL organic Ontario produce…like every fucking thing, and some knob head has to go ahead and be a dick over the fact that fucking tomatoes are actually bought 130 clicks away instead of 30. In my eyes, local is ALL ONTARIO and that is that. Done. You’re a dildo.