Firstly this is long overdue. I realize my blogging has been sporadic at best but to be honest I haven’t had much to talk about so why bore you with dull crap that isn’t fun to read. Alright so onwards to this post…
So my kids have gone to PEI for another few weeks this summer without Troy or I accompanying them. And the worst thing I keep hearing from people is: Oh you must miss them so much, how can you be without them for so long?!
This makes me want to slap you. This makes it sound like I live for my kids. This makes it seem like I can only be happy as a mom, a parent. This means I must have no identity beyond caring for my kids. This is just a dumb statement. I mean, of corse I love my kids, but do I miss them? To be honest (cause that is how I roll), I don’t. Gasp! I know, what an awful woman!
I will explain this further.
My kids live in Ontario, their in-laws and entire family on Troy’s side live in PEI. Can I spend a month every summer in PEI with my kids in order for them to bond with their relatives? No I can’t. I have a life, a business, a dog, a house, a baseball team (Go Shenanigans!), I have things to deal with my life here. Do I want to spend every vacation I have in PEI? No I don’t want that either. I would actually like to visit other places, travel around and experience that big bad world out there. Who out there would like to travel to the same spot every single year, no matter how nice it is? No one. But I can’t deny my kids that connection with their family, especially when they are young and still excited to spend the summer with their grand parents. They talk about their visit for the whole year and the cousins they have spent time with. That is my gift to them, as well as to myself.
I also am so blessed to have family that will take such good care of them. My in-law’s are amazing, my sister in law is absolutely a saint and I have no worries about my kids in their care. Where else can they arrive on a beach, take of their shoes and probably not have to put them on again until they drive back to Ontario?
So why do people assume that since my kids are gone, I am bereft and lonely? Let me tell you this, I have gone to 2 movies, out to dinner so many times I lost count, we have rode our bikes around town visiting friends with no regard for when we have to go home (and believe me we have taken advantage of this). We’re heading to the states this weekend for an impromptu trip with friends to see a ball game, and don’t let me forget to add that I went shopping the other day and I didn’t have to yell at anyone to stop destroying displays, or have to just buy a bunch of random crap in order to speed through the day before the melt downs start. I shopped, I tried things on, and then I got a coffee and went home in my own time. HEAVEN.
But one of my favourite things is that I DON’T HAVE TO MAKE 17 MEALS A DAY THAT ARE BARELY EATEN. I wake up around 9, roll around twitter, sip 3 coffees, eat a leisurely breakfast, do some work, and then when Troy comes home we decide what adventure we will partake of that night.
IT’S. SO. FUN.
So I’m just letting those folks out there who have looked at me in horror when I say my kids are in PEI and I have no idea when they are heading home that sure I love my kids, but nope I don’t miss them. I will see them in a few weeks, I will cuddle them and then we will proceed to start the hectic school year, the busy sport schedules, the incredibly arduous task of breaking the late summer bedtime routines, the effing packing of lunches, getting kids to the bus on time, setting alarms to workout at the butt crack of dawn, making meals that typically get an EW! and trying to get the kids to wear shoes again.
Writing that statement alone warrants another cup of coffee and watching a show of my choice in the middle of the day which I can totally do if I want to! Boom. Nailed it.