So this conversation was had last night:
Me: (as we are reading our will before signing) So should we like give stuff to certain people or like bequeath stuff?
Troy: I dunno, who wants this stuff anyways? Do we have anything important to will other than our wedding rings?
Me: You’re right, it’s all just stuff.
Which then has me looking around my house. What is important? What would I save in a fire? What do I want passed down to people that are important to me? The answer is slightly morbid but telling.
Not really anything.
I mean, yes, wedding rings to kids. Maybe my Kitchen Aid mixer for Rhianne as it’s been a long running joke and it’s more for fun then importance. My antique peanut bird dispenser bird thing (I know right) maybe to my dad but he’ll be dead prob when I die. So maybe give it to Rosie as she was with me when I bought it.
Clifford the family dog? Definitely to friends Lisa or Marie cause they hate dogs and that is funny. They will end up giving him to Francis for a chick magnet side kick and that’s how it should be. I mean I’ll be dead, let’s all just have a laugh over my ridiculous life.
When I ventured into the living room, my computer is important but only because of my work, and when I’m dead who gives a crap? My bedroom is devoid of anything but clothes and books really, so nothing there. My Kobo is probably my most valued possession (I’m not joking) and that can be chucked as it’s cracked and wouldn’t mean anything but clutter for anyone I gave it to.
The kids rooms perhaps have the only things I might give away. My creepy doll collection to my sis, our tickle trunk of dress up clothes should definitely go to the Cowans for sentimental reasons, but other then that I have nothing of real importance. Or value.
And that is perfect.
No people fighting over dumb things. Nothing for my executor to handle. No one wants to live in my small house, so sell it to the neighbors for cheap so they can expand their compound. The cars are crap. Nothing for the kids to fight over, nothing for family to argue about.
I mean, this was an amazing wake up call on what is important in my life. I don’t want to leave a legacy besides security for my kids and that is all I’ve ever focused on. Life insurance up the ass, and boom, spend the rest on trips and books and makeup. I’m happy.
But I think this is a good lesson for myself as well as anyone who might read this: what is truly of value in your life? What is worth putting in your will? I love the idea of a memorandum of fun stuff to give away, THAT will be my legacy. Let’s not be sad. Instead, have a party and here so and so, Kelly wanted you to have the dollar store Halloween crow that has been up for 2 years in her living room…enjoy!
With the holidays around the corner, we all have been guilty of overspending at some point. I mean, why do we attack this commercial crap when it’s going to be thrown out eventually? This time of year is the worst for me. I hate the greed, the commercials that advertise buying diamonds and iPads as normal everyday gifts. It’s not exactly Christmas I hate, it’s the pressure to buy the PERFECT gift which normally translates to lots of money.
A friend of mine had a fantastic suggestion which I have TRIED for years to get my family to follow but no dice. The idea was to give the grandkids ‘experiences’ not presents. Take Finn to LEGOland, Great Wolf Lodge, the zoo, a movie – anything at all. Just do something with them instead of buying stuff that will end up in Goodwill in 6 months.
I still love this idea, and I’m focusing a good chunk of our holiday budget on ski equipment for kids, as well as a ski vacation in February. I don’t care if they like it, they are going to enjoy the good old fashioned family holiday in misery like the rest of us and they will remember it when they are old and grumpy which is more then I can say for half the things in their rooms.
So as I sit here in my kitchen, I feel happy that I ‘think’ I’m doing things right in my life. Enjoying time with friends, having no regrets, not sweating the small stuff or worrying about keeping up with the Jones’. The phrase ‘You Can’t Take It With You’ has never rung more true for me and being on the verge of holiday mayhem I hope I keep up the good attitude and not find myself in Toys R Us in a panic. But if I do, I trust my husband to steer me away…and to a bar.
This picture makes me want to barf with anxiety over the holidays – lol